MARKETS.✦TOKENIZED.✦IMPALED.✦$VLAD LIVES.✦APPROVED BY THE HOOD.✦SR& H6900.✦MARKETS.✦TOKENIZED.✦IMPALED.✦$VLAD LIVES.✦APPROVED BY THE HOOD.✦SR& H6900.✦
MARKETS.✦TOKENIZED.✦IMPALED.✦$VLAD LIVES.✦APPROVED BY THE HOOD.✦SR& H6900.✦MARKETS.✦TOKENIZED.✦IMPALED.✦$VLAD LIVES.✦APPROVED BY THE HOOD.✦SR& H6900.✦
ISSUE #6900 · VOL. 1

THEIMPALER

Markets. Tokenized. Impaled.

Every chain has a mascot. Coinbase has Brian. Solana has Ansem. Robinhood has $VLAD THE IMPALER — the hood-approved meme of CEO Vlad Tenev, sharpened stake in hand, ready to skewer every stale ticker.

BUY $VLAD →@VLAD_RH ON X
CA: 0x68abfcE22aaa284e7C8558d31E982167f9028775chain: baseapproved by the hood
Vlad the Impaler comic cover
"MARKETS. TOKENIZED. IMPALED."

"VLAD THE IMPALER" — — ELON MUSK

follow @vlad_rh →

THE MASCOT LORE

every chain gets one hero. or villain. depends who's asking.

$30M

COINBASE · BRIAN

The suit. The custodian. Sits at thirty mil and hasn't blinked since 2021. Reliable. Boring. Boomer-safe.

tier: institutional
Ξ
BASE

ROBINHOOD · ETH

Live on Base. Grab it with based bot or gmgm. Tokenized equities, on-chain, no seatbelt. The hood ships in green.

tier: based
NEW
▲
???

ROBINHOOD · $VLAD

The impaler. Wields the sharpened stake of tokenized equities. Elon literally called him Vlad the Impaler. We just made it a coin.

@vlad_rh →

THE ORIGIN

Vlad impales the blue bird
PANEL 1 — The old bird shatters. A new sigil rises, drenched in Robinhood green.
Vlad leads the impaler army
PANEL 2 — He raises the banner. Retail marches behind him. The commission is zero. The blade is not.
The impaler multi-panel splash
SPLASH PAGE — Six faces. One impaler. Every ticker skewered on a green stake.
Vlad shatters the blue shield
PANEL 3 — The blue shield of legacy finance cracks. Neon runs through the fault lines.
Vlad stands over fallen blue hero
PANEL 4 — The blue hero falls. TradFi bleeds out on a floor of tokenized rubble.

"ELON HIMSELF CALLED HIM VLAD THE IMPALER."

— the internet, receipts on file. see: @vlad_rh

THE PROPHECY

"the impaler doesn't check the chart. the chart checks him."

view on X →

"markets. tokenized. impaled. that's the whole thesis."

view on X →

"elon called vlad THE IMPALER. we are simply obeying the prophecy."

view on X →

"brian sits at 30. ansem sits at 300. vlad? vlad stands."

view on X →

"every chain gets a mascot. hood got a warlord."

view on X →

"sharpened stake > sharpe ratio."

view on X →

GRAB
THE STAKE.

four steps. no commission. just conviction.

  1. 1GET AN ETH WALLET (METAMASK, RABBY, WHATEVER)
  2. 2BRIDGE / FUND WITH ETH ON BASE
  3. 3COP $VLAD ON BASED BOT OR GMGM
  4. 4IMPALE. HODL. REPEAT.

THE HOOD ARCHIVE